Better Than a Box of Chocolates
by talkofcake
Summary: Colonel Carter, commander of the General Hammond, is feeling rather lonely. Thank God for Asgard beaming technology. Sam/Jack, post-Enemy at the Gate.


He really should have been used to the sensation by now. Actually, it wasn't even a sensation at all, because there was no slight wave of nausea that accompanied the event as there may have been with gate travel. That was the Asgards for you, he thought with a snort. What he should have been used to however, was the complete and utter surprise of one minute being in the privacy and comfort of his home and the next being somewhere totally different. It was rather disorientating. He wondered for a minute, what if he had been changing? Or going to the bathroom? How embarrassing.

Jack gazed out the window at the glowing multicolored orb below him. Even after all these years, it was still a breathtaking sight. He pondered where his house was in relation to his current birds-eye view.

Someone cleared their throat behind him. He spun around on his heel and was instantly greeted by an even more breathtaking sight: Carter, dressed from head to toe in her green jumpsuit and companion boots, hair slung back in a ponytail. She looked divine.

"Carter!" He said after a beat, grinning.

"Hi, sir," she replied, returning his grin with one of her own. "Welcome aboard the _General Hammond_." Despite the happiness of the situation, there was a hint of nostalgia and mourning that crept up behind her smile at the mention of the ship's name.

"So, what brings you▬me...to this neck of the woods?" he asked, gesturing around at the bridge and the crew of the X-304 where he now stood.

"Sorry for the surprise, sir, but you'd mentioned you wanted a tour of my ship," she said, an obvious lie arising in the form of a glimmer in her eye. Well, it wasn't a _total_ lie, because he had. "We just got back from our mission to the Pegasus galaxy, and since we're only going to be here for a few days doing system upgrades, I figured now would be the perfect time."

A smirk played on his lips, but he wouldn't call her bluff. Not here, anyways.

"Of course," he replied, taking a step down to her level and quickly dragging his eyes up and down her figure, a gesture that her crew remained completely oblivious to but left her blushing. "A tour it is!"

"This way, sir," she said.

Sam sent a nod towards Major something or other (Jack had trouble keeping up these days), before her fingers ever so lightly brushed against his elbow as they departed from the bridge.

They walked in silence for a few moments down one of the many corridors, his hands lazily stuffed into his over-sized pockets, her arms crossed comfortably over her chest, and their shoulders bumping together with every step they took. It emitted a smile from both of them.

"So. Where are we headed?"

"Your pick. Hangar deck, commissary, or my quarters?"

He raised an eyebrow, smirking. "Your quarters, hey? Is that part of the official tour, Colonel?"

A small laugh escaped from her lips. "Not the _official_ one, per se."

He pondered his options for a moment, wanting nothing more than to pull her into a hug and tell her how much he had missed her the last few weeks she'd been gone. And she hadn't been gone just on a business trip across the country. No, her work took her into an entirely different galaxy, the same galaxy that had stolen her from him for an entire year during her Atlantis command. Talk about long distance relationships, he thought.

As he continued to think while they walked, Jack could tell her eagerness to not only see him, but also to show off the newest addition to Earth's defense that happened to be totally under her command. He thought back to the day only three months ago when he'd attended the meeting to determine who would be taking command of the new vessel. His vote automatically went to Carter, who was practically going stir crazy back at the SGC after being relieved of her post at Atlantis. Much to his surprise, the six other officials to cast votes had agreed with his decision, and that evening he'd immediately taken a flight to Colorado to personally give her the news. She'd been overwhelmed. Giddy even, a very un-Carter characteristic that plastered a grin on his face. And here she was now, three months later, commander of her very own X-304.

He fell back a step behind her, watching her walk through the bustling corridor with a sense of pride he'd only ever seen her wear upon visiting her in Atlantis some months ago. She'd carried herself the same way as she led him through the halls of the Ancient city, proud to show him not only the city itself but undoubtedly how far she'd come since being the young, bright-eyed Captain that walked into his life over a decade ago. If anyone was proud however, it was him, more now than ever as he watched her smile and nod at various officers she passed by. She stopped suddenly, noticing he was lagging, turned to him and raised a brow.

"What?"

"What?" he fired back, smiling.

"You're thinking, I can tell. That scares me," she joked.

"Am I?"

"It's not a hard decision, although I do suggest our first stop should be the commissary if you're hungry. Meatloaf today," she said, grinning as he fell back in step with her.

"That depends on what's for dessert."

She beamed. "Cake."

"Well, why are we even having this discussion, Carter? Food, it is."

She led him down several more corridors (all that he noted look exactly identical; how the hell did anyone navigate their way around a ship like this?) until the smell of food, or something resembling food, found its way into his nostrils and instantly made his stomach rumble.

"Meatloaf, you say?"

"Yes, sir," she replied with a grin.

Once in the commissary, they stepped in line with several other officers and deck crew on their lunch breaks.

"It's a nice-looking ship you got here," he commented randomly as they waited.

"Thanks," she said, eying him over her shoulder. "Isn't it though? I think General Hammond would have loved it. Probably would have wanted to command it himself." Her smile turned bittersweet, and he placed his hand on the small of her back to motion her forward in the line but didn't remove it until it was their turn to plop food items on their trays.

Jack stood eagerly over the desserts and finally settled on two different types of cake, which drew a mock glare from her.

They chose a window seat with their backs away from the majority of the crowd, offering them a fantastic view of the illuminated planet below. Their knees bumped as they sat down, but neither of them seemed to care.

"So how was your trip back to Pegasus?" he asked, chewing on a carrot.

"It was nice. Woolsey's doing a great job, actually. He's changed a lot. Maybe this position was just what he needed."

"To soften the stick up his ass, you mean?"

She chuckled and nodded, taking a spoonful of mashed potatoes into her mouth.

"And what did you do the last few weeks?"

"I attended far too many meetings, did far too much paperwork, got caught up on this season of the Simpsons, visited the SGC, bugged Daniel, and then did a little cleaning."

"Cleaning?" she asked with a raised brow, swallowing her meatloaf.

"Yeah, well, what can I say? I got bored without you."

He set down his fork and gently brushed his finger against the top of her hand, eyes soft and loving as he studied her. In other words, Sam thought with a smile, he missed her.

"Me too," she said. And he nodded, completely understanding.

The need to take her into his arms was overwhelming, and he suddenly wondered if the order of operations on this tour should have been reversed. What he wouldn't give for a little privacy right about now. But years of practice had paid off, and the simple gesture of their fingers entangled together proved almost just as rewarding and dampened his urge momentarily.

"We leave in a couple of days again," she explained, clearing her throat and separating their hands. She picked up her fork and stabbed mindlessly at the meatloaf on her plate. "Going to pick up SG-13 on P3X-697. The gate and DHD were buried in a mudslide during a rainstorm last night, but everyone on the team is safe for the time being. Studying the artifacts on the planet."

"Ah, yes. Daniel mentioned that to me while I was bugging him. Seemed pretty disappointed he wasn't geeking out with them over the ruins."

"So..." she said, dropping her fork again and peering at him.

"So what?" he asked, nudging her leg with his own.

"You wanna come with? It's only a couple hours from here and I thought you might like to get in on the action." She grinned.

"Well, I do have a meeting, but..." His words trailed off and he smirked. "I can probably fit you in," he replied, before taking an over-sized forkful of cake and loading it into his mouth. "Especially if there's cake involved." His words were muffled and barely distinguishable.

She playfully hit him on the shoulder.

"Don't talk with your mouth full."

"Don't talk with your mouth full, _sir_," he said, purposely letting some of the cake in his mouth creep past his lips, giving her a very unpleasant sight.

"Sir," she added in disgust, hitting him again. "What are you, five?"

"Yup!" he said, before adding yet another forkful into his already bulging mouth.

She rolled her eyes. He plunged his fork into the spongy dessert again, but this time lifted it to her mouth, prodding playfully at her lips with his utensil. She let out a laugh and withdrew her head, laughing even more when he made airplane noises and maneuvered the fork towards her mouth. Some days she wondered how he'd managed to become an Air Force General. She bit her lip and refused again, but finally, after his "Come on, Carter, it's delicious" and the adorable look on his face, she willingly opened her mouth and he plunged the cake inside, purposely brushing a piece of frosting on her cheek as he drew back.

"Hey!" she cried as she chewed.

"Don't talk with your mouth full, Carter," he mocked, grinning as he nodded towards her cheek. "You should really be more careful next time."

Without further warning, he reached forward and dabbed at her skin with his napkin, an innocent gesture until the napkin was replaced with the warmth of his hand. She didn't mean to let that moan escape from her mouth, or for her eyes to flutter close, but the sudden, lingering contact had taken her off-guard. Even when she did manage to open her eyes again, his hand remained on her face, brushing his thumb over her cheek.

Their eyes met and she cleared her throat then, nodding her head towards the room behind them. He frowned and dropped his hand.

"Maybe we should check out that hangar deck now?" he suggested, wiping his mouth with the napkin and looking expectantly at her.

That surprised her even more than their previous contact.

"The _hangar deck_? What about..."

"Your idea."

"Right," she said, before mimicking his earlier actions and wiping her mouth with her napkin. She stood and he followed suit, gathering up their trays. "I thought you might be interested in seeing our newest collection of F-302s, equipped with hyper drive capabilities and five times faster sub-light engines. Not to mention way more firepower than the last line."

"Cool," he said, dumping their trays off and following her out of the commissary. "New toys, huh?"

"Yes, sir. Maybe I'll let you take one for a ride later," she said.

He coughed and she stopped, peering at him in confusion before her mouth gaped open as she realized his innuendo. She gave him a kick in the shin and began walking again.

"Hey!" he said, limping along after her. "You said it, not me!"

She let out a slight snort, not stopping for him to catch up with her as she made her way to the elevator shaft. He did manage to catch up though, wobbling a little bit more than necessary in attempts to play on her sympathy (didn't work), even whining on about how hard the Air Force were manufacturing their boots these days (also didn't work). Amidst a complaint, he barely had time to jump into the elevator before the doors rolled shut.

"Six decks down," she said, biting her cheek to keep her laughter at bay.

"Are there any cameras in this thing?"

She narrowed her brows and looked at him, shaking her head. "No?"

"Good."

Before she had time to react, he closed the distance between them and had her against the wall, lips finding hers in a fury. Her arms instinctively went up and wrapped around his neck, pulling him closer to her as her fingers raked through the short gray hairs on his head. A moan escaped from her lips as his mouth continued to claim hers, tongue sliding into the warm, moist cavern and undoubtedly making up for lost time. His hands found her waist, traveling lower down her backside and squeezing.

A _ding_ brought him back to reality. She quickly shoved him aside, just as the doors slid open and a deckhand personnel stepped in.

"Sir, ma'am," the young girl said.

"Captain," Sam acknowledged. "What deck?"

"Deck 7," she replied, smiling.

Jack guessed she had to be in her early twenties, and he wondered how big of a geek the kid had to be to get a job like this. He glanced over at Carter and had to smile at the way her cheeks were flushed and her uniform was slightly wrinkled from their brief encounter. The Captain probably didn't pay a notice to it, but Jack thought Carter couldn't look any more gorgeous than she currently did.

Well, maybe without those clothes on...

The shaft rolled to a stop, and the young Captain made her departure, leaving them alone once again.

"Just one more to go," she said, pushing a button. The elevator lurched to life once again. "And don't you ever do that again," she added quietly, straightening her uniform and smoothing back her hair.

"Yes, ma'am," he replied, even though he couldn't help but smirking over the fact that she'd had four levels to pull away but never did.

The elevator came to its final stop and the doors slid open.

"After you, Colonel," he said, motioning for her to exit.

She led him down a corridor until they came to a hatch at the end of the hall. She entered a few digits into the keypad and the hatch slid open, revealing an impressively large hangar bay with rows of the new and improved fighters.

"Sweet," he murmured, following her into the large area.

"Sixteen fighters total, each equipped with five times stronger energy weapons than the last set, and all with their own hyper drive engines as I mentioned before."

"And no one to fight," he added, admiring one of the fighters closeup. "Shame."

"Well, you never know. We do have a habit of pissing off new bad guys every few years or so." She wheeled over a ladder and attached it securely to the F-302. "And they've provided excellent hands-on training."

Jack smirked. He wouldn't mind getting his hands on _her_ right about now.

She ascended the steps, and he couldn't help but admiring her backside as she did so. He gazed up, wondering if anyone else in the air force could make that jumper look half as good as she did. The clear of her throat sent his eyes flying up to meet her own as she glared at him over her shoulder.

"Come here," she said, sending a nod towards the aircraft she leaned against.

He quickly complied, his knees defying his age as he followed her up the ladder and came to rest behind her at the top. She peered at him over her shoulder with a smile, before turning and popping open the shield so he could get a better view of the cockpit. His earlier wish that the tour had led him straight to her personal quarters was now the furthest thing from his mind as he leaned into her from behind and peered over her shoulder, body snuggly pressed against hers.

"Looks great," he commented. _Feels great too._

His arms went around either side of her to steady himself against the aircraft. He craned his neck to study the mechanics of the ship, leaning even closer into her in the process. He could have sworn he heard her moan.

"Tasers?" he teased.

She laughed, shaking her head and shifting her weight to her opposite foot, rubbing against him in turn. It was his turn to moan.

"Jesus, Carter."

"Sorry, sir," she said quietly. She reached forward and flicked on a switch, which caused the internal power systems to light up and come to life.

"Sweet," he said again, reaching around her and dabbling with the screen. "I think I might take you up on that offer later," he continued, lips pressed against her ear, his hot breath sending a shiver down her spine.

"Oh yeah?" she asked. "Which one?"

"I'm in the mood for quite the ride," he said.

The innuendo was ridiculous and he knew it. He practically winced himself as the words left his mouth. It was so ridiculous that a fit of giggles escaped her, causing her body to shake and tremble against him. He buried his head into her neck, placing warm kisses on the sensitive skin there, her eyes fluttering shut in response. He groaned as she pressed her lower body into his. His grip on the craft only tightened, and the sudden image of both of them tumbling backwards to the ground below caused him to grimace. But the image that followed of them trying to explain the accident to everyone had him smiling into her neck. She could feel his smile against her skin and turned to glance at him.

"Maybe we should get down," she suggested, planting a kiss to the top of his head.

He looked up at her and straightened before leaning forward to capture her lips in his briefly. Pulling back, he descended the ladder, and after shutting off the fighter and resealing the shield, she did the same. But as soon as her feet hit the ground, she gasped when his hands found her waist and tugged her towards him.

"So now that I've eaten in the commissary and seen the hangar bay," he asked, smiling as her hands flattened against his chest, "what's next on the tour, Colonel?"

Her breathing increased. The amount of close proximity to this man after so many weeks of being in a completely different galaxy than him was driving her mad. Avoiding her earlier order altogether, she gave into temptation and leaned up to tug his bottom lip between her teeth, nipping gently before soothing it over with a ferocious kiss that had him backing them against the ladder for support.

Hands roamed while pulses sped up. His hands finally settled on her hips and brought her even closer to him, nudging apart her legs with his knee. She threw her head back and groaned, and he immediately took advantage of the open skin on her neck and devoured it. He settled back and leaned on one of the steps, dragging her with him, crying out into her neck when her knee came in contact with the growing bulge in his pants. She smiled wildly at his reaction, hand traveling down to wander beneath his shirt and caress the warm skin she found there. His fingers went to work on the zipper of her suit, quickly unfastening the top and unzipping it in one, fluid movement. What he found underneath caused him to groan: a white, very see-through tank that clung to her body and left little to his imagination.

Not that he needed to do much imagining these days.

He groped her breasts through the fabric, and a happy sigh escaped her lips, but it was obvious she had other things planned by the very confident path her hand took further and further south down his torso. Before he knew it, the buckle of his pants was unfastened and one of her delicate fingers was circling the button above his fly.

"Carter," he gasped.

She undid the button and slowly made her way down the length of his body until she was on her knees.

"Yeah?" she asked ever so innocently, despite what she was doing was anything but innocent. His hands flew to either side of the ladder and gripped tightly.

He'd wanted a ride, and boy was he going to get one.

He gazed down at the sight of her, the top of her blonde head dangerously close to his throbbing arousal. He waited, still holding onto the railings for dear life as she unzipped his pants at a painfully slow rate, sending him a wicked smile in the process. As if she wasn't already killing him, he groaned as the tip of her fingernail traced the outline of his erection through his boxers, teasing and tantalizing him and driving him utterly crazy. There were so many reasons why they shouldn't be doing this, here of all places, but good Lord, if they were going to, she could at least play nice.

She seemed to sense his desperation and in a shockingly quick moment, she reached into the opening of his boxers and drew him out into the warmth of her hand.

"So are you enjoying the tour so far, General?"

"Yes," he said, hissing as her palm encompassed him even tighter for emphasis.

He threw his head back, trying to steady his breathing as she began to run her hand up and down his length. His eyes flew open when he felt her hot, warm breath approach his tip, and before he had time to suggest that maybe this all wasn't such a good idea (the setting, not so much what she was about to do to him, because▬oh god...), her tongue flicked out to capture the silky bead that escaped from his slit. He sucked in a harsh breath. She looked at up him with unscathed hunger, nails scraping along his sensitive flesh.

"Carter," he mumbled. "I..."

"You what?" she asked, leaning forward and dragging her tongue on the underside of his length. He groaned, and one hand flew from the railing and found its way into her hair. "You want something?"

He nodded fervently, digging his hand into her hair as she continued to tease him.

"Carter, please," he begged, his other hand joining the other.

Her hot, wet mouth engulfed his head, hand grasping what the recesses of her mouth could not. His breathing became pants. He desperately tried to think of anything besides the miracles her lips were performing on him, which proved to be a difficult, if not impossible task to master.

Speaking of mastering tasks.

"Oh God," he groaned, swallowing hard as she continued to travel up and down along his length with that glorious mouth of hers. "Carter, I...I think you should stop soon."

Obeying him as if he was giving her an order, she slid her mouth off of his arousal with a _pop_ and released him from her grasp, peering up at him with a smile and raised brows.

"You sure about that? I mean, if you're ready to head to my quarters for the final part of the tour, be my guest." She nodded towards his pants and bobbing erection and smirked.

"Well..."

"Your idea," she shot back at him, standing up and placing her hands on her hips.

His eyes traveled from that damn smirk on her face down to where her breasts smiled at him through the thin fabric of her tank, revealing what appeared to be a lacy, pink undergarment and two very taut nipples.

"Get back over here."

"Is that an order?" she teased.

"Does it have to be?"

"That depends."

"On what exactly?" He cocked an eyebrow.

"On what you plan on doing with me," she replied, toying with the zipper that now rested just under her stomach.

"I don't like revealing my war tactics," he said, somehow managing to smirk despite the unrelieved, aching tension below his belly. "So maybe you should just come on over and find out for yourself."

"Anyone could walk in," she reminded him.

He took a step towards her and pushed the jumpsuit off of her shoulders, fingers dancing under the hem of her tank.

"Yeah? Did you stop to think about that before you got down on your knees?"

She didn't have time to answer before he leaned down and kissed that playful smile right off of her lips. His hands snaked up, under her shirt, palms encompassing her breasts, and thumbs playing with her already hardened nipples. She groaned against his mouth and grabbed onto his arms as one of his hands was replaced by his lips. He nudged the fabric of her bra away with his nose and took a taut nub into his mouth, nipping at it with his teeth and sending waves of pleasure straight to her throbbing center.

He picked her up and spun them around, placing her atop one of the steps. She gasped, gripping the railing as he yanked her jumpsuit down to her ankles, a low growl sounding from the back of his throat.

"Last stop of the tour's gonna have to wait," he said, lips finding her neck while his hands went to work on pushing aside her underwear.

Suddenly a set of lights flicked on with a hum overhead, followed by the whirring of the hatch opening and a set of footsteps that echoed in the vast room.

_Or not._

Sam sucked in a breath. Both of them went perfectly still as they listened to the footsteps stop somewhere across the room and a faint whistling of some nondescript tune fill the air. Her panic turned to giggles, and she quickly buried her head in his shoulder as her body shook with silent laughter. He joined her, the irony of the entire situation catching up with them. She failed to remain totally silent, and one of her giggles escaped her lips in a high-pitched squeak.

The whistling stopped.

"Hello?"

It was a young, female voice, and the vision of Captain whatever-her-name-was from the elevator entered Jack's mind. He steadied his laughter and lowered Carter from the ladder in a quick movement. She pulled up her jumpsuit while he made work of zipping up his pants, wincing at the strain as he fastened his fly. He went to push a hair behind her ear, but she swatted him away, pulling out her pony and smoothing all of the stray blonde locks into place before re-fastening the hairband. She reached forward and quickly pulled down his shirt to conceal the bulge in his pants.

The young Captain hesitantly rounded the fighter and her eyes grew wide.

"Ma'am! Sir! I'm...I'm so sorry...I...I didn't realize anyone was in here! I was just doing routine maintenance on D-deck before I▬"

"It's alright, Captain. I was just showing the General around," Sam lied.

"Yes," he added, clearing his throat. "I was admiring what a nice set of birds she has."

A laugh threatened to escape Sam's mouth, but she quickly disguised it in a cough and raised her arm to conceal the smile on her face.

He was in _so_ much trouble.

"Oh. Of course," the girl replied, nodding and dramatizing a look of understanding. She obviously wasn't buying the lie, and Sam silently wondered how many of her crew were going to be hearing a rather scandalous rumor later on involving an Air Force Colonel and General fraternizing in the local hangar bay.

"Well, thank you Captain, we'll be on our way. Carry on!" Sam said quickly, grabbing Jack by the arm and tugging him towards the exit.

The last part of the tour finally came to a close when the click of a door led them into her quarters. Jack's earlier thought about Carter looking even more gorgeous than he already thought possible, without the barrier of her uniform, proved to be more right than he knew, and he gave her a loving smile as clothing articles were shed hastily on the floor and she now lay on the bed, smiling back up at him.

He settled next to her, the bed dipping a bit under his weight, and propped himself up on his elbow as his fingers traced lazy circles on the soft skin of her stomach. For all the haste to get to this point, now all he wanted to do was take his time and express how much he had truly missed her in ways that words would only hinder. The loving gleam in her eyes as she smiled at him reassured him she felt the exact same way.

Jack leaned down and pressed a firm kiss to her shoulder, then buried his head into her neck and inhaled her deeply.

"Did you enjoy you tour, sir?" she asked sweetly, combing her fingers through his hair.

"Tour's not over, Colonel," he reminded her. She could feel his grin on her neck and it coursed a shiver through her spine.

Her fingers lightly danced over his back, occasionally being replaced with the soft scrape of her nails. It was his turn to shiver. As he looked up and met her eyes, he decided against shooting out a ridiculous follow-up joke about his promised ride. If he was confident it would emit a giggle from her, he would have done it, but the moment was so tender that the non-playful glare he imagined her giving him in return just didn't cut it. In the end, he settled for moving up her body and settling his mouth atop hers, kissing her deep and slow as their bodies melted together. When he drew back and brushed a piece of golden hair from her eye, that giggle he so badly wanted to hear from her earlier surprisingly filled his ears.

"What?" he asked, smirking.

"It's just..." She shook her head and ran her hands over his face until they came to settle clasped together at the back of his neck. "I just find it sort of satisfying that I can beam you up to my ship whenever I want you." She grinned at him.

"Ah. Yes. If Thor's skinny butt was still around I'd be thanking him for that." He paused and ran his fingers down her abdomen, touch almost a tickle but full of promise. "Maybe the Asgard finally paid us back for all those times we saved their collective alien asses."

She shut her eyes as his fingers traveled lower, a soft moan escaping from her lips.

"I think that's a pretty safe assumption."

The next noise out of her mouth, followed by a very dangerous journey her own hand was taking, emitted a groan from somewhere deep in his throat, and he buried his head into her shoulder once again.

"Please tell me you're back in this galaxy for good," he gasped.

Oh, yeah. Jack was pretty sure the Asgard had paid their dues. As Carter flipped them over and straddled his hips, he was also pretty sure (ridiculous innuendo aside) he was about to get that one hell of a ride she'd promised him.


End file.
